Holland or the Netherlands?

The difference between Holland and the Netherlands!

Saar 5

exhausted after anti-biotics horror-hour

Due to recent donations, yesterday I was able to visit Saar in German clinic, where she's treated for Neuro Borrelioses Lyme. Her brainstem is inflammated and it will take a long time before she will be cured, IF she can be cured.

So far things are going so-so, as the Doctor said, It can go both ways... :( and this makes me sad. She can either come out this half-ok (she'll never be able to walk more than a few steps due to her EDS) but most likely she'll end up in a wheelchair with more complications than ever before.

So why am I putting so much energy in this beautiful young mother?? People ask me; Why do you ask for money, so you can document her physical and emotional pains? Well, because I LOVE HER and she wants me to. She is so pure and fine, and all her family and friends too.


They are 3 hours away from her, so I was very happy Saar's mom gave me a ride and we could visit her with her baby Elijah.

Elijah's turning 1 next weekend, and Saar won't be home...

But it's very impressive to see all the people who care for her, physicly and mentally, the doctors, family and friends, dear Nutella, Saar's powerwoman, dragging her through all misery when she e.g. gets her iv with the anti-biotics and Saar's daily hour of pure horror starts. Witnessing this was overwhelming, made my heart ache and OMG Nutella is great, way to go supergirl!!!! ♥ RESPECT.

So much happened yesterday. I really need to let it settle and when I am done with post production I'll write down my story. Dear Saar, I love you!!  xOxOx

Before the anti-biotics all was 'fine'

Thank you all so much for your support and making it possible for me to go to Saar!!!! 

Hopefully she can go home soon and have her treatment there instead of 3 hours aways from her kids and husband. Ofcourse I'll follow this process too, so please don't stop donating, as Saar won't be cured in the nearby future. Maybe she'll never walk again...

If you'd like to support Saar and her family, so I can work with her... please donate via Paypal

*** God bless you ***

Working Girl!

Opening of Miss Selfridge, 1993-1994, The Working Girls

The first events I covered as photographer were the opening days op the new Miss Selfridge stores in the Netherlands. I was working as a sales woman in the Breda store, parttime, as I was studying at the Academy of Arts to become a professional photographer, when they asked me to cover the events.

I was paid the high amount (NOT ;) of 150 guilders, approx. $ 70,- which at that time seemed an awful lot of money. But do consider this; I had to buy film, process it and order prints too...so I don't think I made real money. But it was fun! Big fun! (and big hair LOL ;)

The drag-queen group The Working Girls always performed at the openings and is alive and kicking still! I love 'em! When dropping these Polaroids at their fanpage I read a note saying '20 years in the business, congrats!' which made me realise I am an event photographer for 20 years as well!!
Hooray! And still going strong!

To celebrate this fantastic fact we dropped down the price of a full day package, including all files HR from $ 1500,- to $ 500,- when booking your date before 1 Ausgust 2013. Package includes: 5-6 hours of photography between 9AM-7PM including all files send via Wetransfer.

This is a fab occasion to book a professional photographer to your wedding, event or other happy (or sad) day. It's indeed possible to book a wedding date 7 September 2013 and pay $ 500,- as long as it's booked and pre-paid before 1 August 2013. Check for dates and possibilities via info@artstudio23.com or like us on Facebook or Twitter and send a pb.

San Francisco Music Tech Summit, oktober 2012

Chek out more of my recent work on Google+.

Saar 4

Saar...

my dear Sarhea.

She's in bed for 2,5 months now... In her last update on Facebook she talked about all the things she could do, 2,5 months ago. "I could still walk (a few steps, but I could), I could sit up, play my keyboard and sing (one chorusline, but I could) and now... I hardly can do ANYTHING anymore"

She feels abandoned, is in pain and she misses her kids. They've transfered her to the German clinic now, but not before opererating on her in a German hospital to get her a PEG tube, connected to her stomage.

PEG tube - right after surgery

Waking up afterwards

Before:

Whatsapping Saar, as this is the only thing she can do still

She misses her kids...

She doesn't want to be alone in this pain

One night in her new house (18 February 2013)

Being in the clinic in Germany is getting to her, as she feels so alone. Even when someone is with her, she has to cope with her pains and worrying herself. She doesn't see the kids very often (Rheinbach is a long way from home) and her husband has to work, as he already missed a lot of appointments. (he's a young dentist)

The (non-medical) people looking after her already feel locked up after one day, imagine how you feel being in bed for 2,5 months?!? Saar wasn't very mobile before due to her EDS (Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome), but at least she could get out of the house, use her mobility scooter to drop her daughter of at school etc.
She hardly sees the sun at the moment, or can breath fresh air. She just... lies in her bed. And feels the pain's this Lyme disease is causing her. Neuro Borreliose, causing an inflammated brainstem, paralising her, and making her weaker than ever before...

When food reaches her stomage it hurts...

Oh, how I wish I could make the pain go away, Lyme go away and make her feel better. Actually...I can. She would like me to come over to her in Germany, to do another day of shooting, to document her life being this ill.

YOU can help!

If you'd like to support Saar and her family, so I can work with her... please donate via Paypal 


God bless you 

x THANK YOU SO MUCH x

San Francisco 1

Guy Kawasaki signing his book APE #SFWC13

'Big' hair! SF Music Tech VII

Check out my iPhonography of the SF Music Tech summit XII and my DSLR photography of the San Francisco Writers Conference 2013. Interested my work? Dayfee $ 1500,- including all files HR. 

Discount! More than one event per year? More information or a quote: info@artstudio23.com

R.L. Stine asks kids to create a ghost story together with him

Union Square

Nob Hill

Valentine's Day in San Francisco

Next to working as an event photographer - Yes, you can hire me worldwide - I also made some gordeous spring snapshots in my free time, what a beautiful city San Francisco is!

Saar & me (1)

Monday 4 February 2013. I was able to go to Saartje who's suffering from neuro borreliose Lyme with my camera!! Thanks to you guys!!!!

I was able to visit her for a day, we were both so very happy I could do so. How many people supported our case, OMG overwhelming. We can still use much more donations, as Saar is very ill and had to go through a lot of (even worse) stuff then I photographed in this day when being with her.

02/04/13:
She warned me numerous times, don't be scared, I look like a wreck etc. My dear, I will be fine. when looking at life from the heart, you don't get scared easily. On my way to Nijmegen, where Saar was in Radboud hospital.
I found her room very quickly, and there she was, hidden in a very large bed. Two Bami-eyes looked at me, happy to see me in person. (we App a lot ;) To me she was Saar still, but I can image that when people haven't seen her for a while they're starteled. She's only a ghost of her former self.

But her eyes speak, and her sweet smile... O, how I love this woman!

Unfortunately you can also see the pain in her eyes...

This photo was right after the lady from physical exercise came to see her. I had just arrived, when this lady turned up for some exercises. Sure, go ahead, but OMG what's going on in hospitals?!? The first question she asked Saar was why she was having the white cloth in her mouth... Woman! She can't swallow! Why does she have to tell this again, and again, to each medical person that arrives at her bed?? "Yes, sorry, but we already need to read so much" (when I suggested this is all in her medical file, right??)

Dutch healthcare...with all the cut downs...the government is more to blame than this lady really. She only tries to do her job properly, in less and less time, with less and less money...
Sarhea was upset, being forced to act so fast, al of a sudden. She needs more time to grasp what's going on, but... there isn't any...

Saar exercising, in the foreground her vanilla pudding

Then a nurse came to measure her blood sugar. She arrives, immedeately grabs her hand and wants to poke her finger with a needle. She did say something about 'testing her sugar' but she didn't explain how or what. So when she takes Saar's hand, Saar wants to take it back, startled with the sudden movement and what's that in the nurse hand?
Ofcourse when the nurse explains it's just a little needle in her finger it's ok, but there is, again, no time to explain her properly what's going on or what needs to be done.

When you see her bruises you know why Saar hates needles.

Blood sugar testing

More physio

Her sugar was ok, finally. But on she went, more physio. Saar had to sit up, Oh, do you need your collar for that, yes! What good is is when she does get up right in the bed, but her neck cracks?!? OMG the lack of respect, it seems like lack of. It's mainly lack of time (money) ...
So sad.

Saar was very, very tired after all this. First photo shows her being stone cold after physio and hiding under the covers. I just sat with her, holding her hand.

She feels so alone. When your admitted in hospital it's worst I reck, the feeling that the world goes on without you. Even though there were plenty of the medical staff and docters visiting her. She's also in a ward with nothing but old patients, so she can't really connect with them. It was good to notice she could relax a little when I held her hand. I was just chattering away, like she wanted me to.

And then Bianca and Dimitri came! "Party" time! What a dolls!! They were determined to take Saar outside for some fresh air and a smoke. Now don't you judge Saar for that, she barely smokes and also she hadn't left the room for four days. As she can't do ANYTHING herself anymore. So this one and only sin should be ok.

We had to drag her out the bed (she can't walk) she needs to be carried everywhere. Her sweet husband Michael does this quite some time now, to get her in the tub, to the toilet...geeee, man, RESPECT to you buddy! The things he'll do for Saar...and has done so far...that is REAL love for sure ♥




















Saar really misses her kids. She being grumpy because of that and also, imagine how her family has to fill in the gap now she's being hospitalised. They are also about to move house (was already planned, before she got this ill) and the new house will need a lot of extra adaptions to get her by.

Sarhea is devestated to be this helpless. She thought having to go to Germany was already a sad thing, but being admitted in this hospital in Nijmegen, the Netherlands, is even worse. It means again more time away from her home and family...

Fun & smoking with Bianca!!

You can see her muscle tense is zero. Look how weird her hand holds the sigaret.

Though it's nice to see her smile, and see her getting a bit more relaxed. We didn't mind accompanying her into the cold fresh air, right Dimitri?? ;)

Back in bed she was supposed to be eating her vanilla pudding. The speach teacher was trying to teach her tricks to be able to swallow some food, they practised the day before and now Saar was going to do so when we were there (to keep an eye on her).

It was so sad to see her try to eat one tea spoon of pudding...my hear broke. All of the pudding just came back... What a sh** disease Lyme is!!!

Two bites of pudding: exhausted...

She fell asleep in Bianca's arms.

Then when she woke up again we worked on getting her nails done. Dimitri being a true nail stylist ;) and now she's got bright red nails again.

Imagine being in a bed the whole day. Nothing but a boring ceiling to look at. (She e.g. can't watch tv, she gets nauseous) Check out this post, with the new nail polish :)

She just can't stay awake...

We took her outside for a second time, and then I had to get back to Breda...Oh, how I wish I could see her again soon! She's not doing well at all, will fill you in on what happened so far asap. But please,


Dear readers: 
if you like to support Saar and her family, so I can follow her and work with her... please make a donation via Paypal to info@mery.nl or send a cheque to
Saar-Artstudio23
Speelhuislaan 173
4815 CD Breda
the Netherlands

If 300 people would donate 10 euro each, I can be with her for over 2 weeks!

THANK YOU

*God Bless You*

Living with a Creative Mind

"Why is creativity often linked to “madness” and why do creative people cause so much frustration to everyone around them? Why do they keep going to extremes? Why can’t they just be like normal people?

Highly creative people have unique vulnerabilities and sensitivities - ways of thinking and temperament that need to be understood and managed – for them to not only stay creative and productive but also stay healthy." >> More: TheSchoolOfLife.com

Perfect image, showing...me!

Wrote a blog about it end of 2012 :)